11/04/13 10:53p
The wrimoer settled  herself in to try another writing spree. She had again gone from being full of motivation to keep up with the Nanowrimo writing challenge to deciding she would completely abandon the project. The only thing tying her to the project was that she had tapped in to aspects of those online communities based around doing this project and they exuded their own pressures about doing it. Even the idea that the  group leader at the local library would be holding writing sessions felt like a pressure to participate. It seemed like it was just peer pressure, the need to do what a group was doing. How did one break away from that?

She wrote now just as she had considered before - "You don't have to decide, just keep doing it so that if you decide you want to do it, you've been keeping up with it all along." This seemed like such foolishness to her. She had liked this advice to herself before, but now it seemed foolish. There seemed to be no real intrinsic reason to do this challenge.

If she wanted to write a book, decided to write a book, knew what she wanted to write a book about, she believed she could and would. It was the making up story thing that she did not understand.

After the marathon session of writing over 5K words on the 2nd day of the challenge, she had indeed become burned out on the challenge. Initially that writing session had raised lots of other thoughts and ideas. It had given her extra insights into the creative process. She had pondered what had been so important to her about the doing of it the first time around.

She realized that this writing effort was either itself an exploration, or an account of an exploration. Like a ship's log account of whatever had gone on with the ship. She was trying to capture her thoughts about at least some of her current experiences and her thoughts in general. Mostly she hoped for thoughts and ideas she found most meaningful and even helpful. This writing was a kind of showcase of where she had been. There were landscapes and places of the mind as much as there were places out there in the world.

Now she was completely falling asleep. What had she just been thinking that made her fall asleep?... She would stop the writing. At least she had done a little bit. All the ideas she had had the morning after that writing stint were stalling about letting her write about them. Had she written them down longhand at least? She would have to wait a bit to find that out, wait until she

11:22 pm - she presumed that was what time she had finished this writing session. That was what time the file had been modified.
484 words